A Quote for life!

“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly.
Specialization is for Insects

Robert A Heinlein
(American science-fiction writer,1907-1988)

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Who are YOU?

A couple of questions:

  1. Why would someone want to stand apart from the crowd?
  2. What is that one motivation that makes people to want to be different?
  3. Why would someone want to sway away from what people around do, be different and even go to the extent to disown or disapprove things that the mass loves to do, and they do not or vice versa?

"আমি এমন না!" (I'm not like this) and then they start off saying, "according to me..."
What the hassle!! Who are you? I mean, seriously!!

I see people posting on Facebook, against using Facebook. They do not like:
  • 1. Selfies
  • 2. Check-Ins
  • 3. Tagging
  • 4. Forwarded messages/posts
  • 5. People liking and commenting on these forwarded messages/posts
  • 6. Updates mentioning one being sick, or eating Ice-Cremes.

I also see people dislike the use of technology - and they find pleasure in pretending to have achieved a lot in life by avoiding the use of technology, may be for a few minutes or hours! Better yet, they post that on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, right after that! Hahaha...

People have a problem with these other group of people who bought high end DSLR Cameras and keep shooting from the leaf to the left out and post those snaps on Facebook. There are jokes saying every monkey behind a lens thinks himself to be a photographer. Some also argue that people become photographers to post on Facebook. How atrocious!! Another abominable theory says that because of Facebook and other social networking, the sale of Camera phones has increased. I can't imagine!!

And then there are few who will login to Facebook every half an hour to check your updates but seldom post anything themselves. And then, they would abuse you for writing so many posts (everything, they say) on Facebook - I mean, preposterous!

Just because I do not do something, does not make everyone else who does that, a minnow or an outcaste! It’s time we grow up. We talk about live and let live and the moment we see someone who is different from us, the base sets itself on fire! We want to be different – do something that majority does not do.

I do not have a Facebook account – I do not give in to the temptation of going social. I am exclusive; you post daily – you do not respect privacy of yourself, your friends and family.
I am non-communal – I do not write about anything related to religion; you wrote about Syria and Taj Mahal – you dip each of your bread-sticks into a communal dish of stew.
I am a photographer – I have spent all my salary for my passion; you do not have a DSLR – you are so non-creative.
I write – I have so many websites and my blogs have so many views; you don’t know what a blog is – you are an illiterate.
I work for an NGO – I serve the nation; you work in an MNC, in an AC office – you are selfish and not adding value to the society, which has provided you with education, security, food and shelter.
I run – I am the one who’s doing great, fit and celebrity; you do not run – you are just a baggage for the society.
I ride bikes – I travel across the length and breadth of the country, through scenic paths with my gang from all over; you don’t do that – you are crippled.
I own my own business – I take decisions, I create jobs, I have all the money; you work for others – you are no less than a slave!

This needs to change!

Well, I call all these people who think like this, hypocrites, sadists and anti-socials. In a want of being different, these people are creating a distance between themselves and the world around. Pretending to be different, elite and exotic individuals, they are actually getting left out only with their challenged individuality – and nothing else. It is important for our growth and peace of mind that we come out of this syndrome, where we look down upon people who are actually different from us and we fail to appreciate their stand.

Well, do not sabotage the above and challenge my intentions. It has been long time that I am seeing these kind of two-faced people around me and on Facebook and other social sites. It is time that someone tell them the reality and show them their actual place in the society! Push to Evolve!!

I do not want to know how it is according to you. I know what it is. Who are you to tell me? Actually no one! Hahaha…



Thursday, April 9, 2015

An answer to a query on Quora

Recently, I opened an account with www.Quora.com and after spending a couple of days, I am really getting fascinated with it. It's more about answering queries raised by someone you may or may not know and adding content to the internet! I'm sure you guys know about it, so let me get straight into a recent answer that I posted on a question.

The Question was: 
How do I find out if a guy can be a good husband?

Here was my answer to it. Let me know if you liked it, anyways:

No! Don't marry!

Marriages are made in heaven - so, you will get the right one that you deserve. There is nothing to waste time choosing the best one, because there is none!

Marriages are successful, only if you stack up one compromise after another and same does your spouse too. Today, how you see your husband/wife, will change over a period of time - and then you cannot blame anyone, saying that day, during the marriage (or whatever) you looked to be a good husband/wife!

Things change, people change, we change - and what is good to us today, may not be that good tomorrow. We cannot force someone to change the way we want him/her to be.

How would you define goodness? I mean, ask yourself, what would you want from your husband? Would he cook for you? Take you to foreign strands? Take care of your child when you attend kitty parties or come home drunk, humiliate and abuse you? What would you like? If you have a checklist of 'Likes' and 'Dislikes' do you think you will find one falling in both the lists?

No, my friend! Don't marry!

The more you would try to define a frame/boundary around the goodness and want your husband/wife to remain within that, the more will you find him/her bulging out of it.

Marriages are adjustments made day in and out. Rather than framing the boundaries beforehand, define them when you get into the relationship and start learning more about each other. The more you know each other, the better you will be able to set boundaries - and in a few years, if you continue adjusting yourself and fitting into his set boundaries for you, both of you will realize that these boundaries are not needed at all!!

Don't Marry! Don't marry if you have this question in mind that you would marry the guy who can be a good husband. Marry the one with whom you enjoy walking around, watching a cricket match, drinking tea or reading the newspaper and who as much wants to spend time with you. That's all that matters - now, and forever.

If you belong to a middle class Indian family, all the thoughts and dreams and desires that you are building up now, will vanish within a span of couple of years. I am not saying all marriages will break, but if your's does not then you will not find time to even think about it. You'll remain entangled with the duties that the beauties of a relationship will fly out of the window and disappear! Whoooshhh!!!

Life is too tough to worry about the future... Live for the moment and when you are in a relationship, try to adjust and fit yourself into it.

No! Don't marry!
Don't marry if you want to move in to a ready made high class flat in a posh area of the town. Marry, if you look at a empty plot and have the determination of soiling your hands, building your own house, and staying in it, with the one you love, forever and a day!!

All the best, my dear friend :)

Check my Blog there, on Quora: Tan's Picks


Friday, March 13, 2015

Colors of Life in Black and White

After all the writing, all the dreaming, all the planning and all the pushing from friends, my first book was published on Feb 17, 2015 – about a month ago. I have been going through a lot of options, talking to a few publishing houses and finally, after over 3 years since I thought first of publishing the book, I had my first published book, in hard copy, in my hands. It was a feeling very different, to hold the book in my hands, with my name printed on it.

And then, my parents came home. I handed over the first copy to Maa and that was it – a dream coming true! Maa was happy, but not exuberant because of two important reasons:
1. The book is not in Bengali
2. The book is not available at the Agartala Book Fair

Well, I could not have done anything about the point 2, but I could have definitely published the first book in Bengali. I did not think about this aspect, though. But then… not sure when and how would I be able to do that. Anyways, my next books would feature a Bengali book for sure. Only time will tell…

I want to thank all my friends who have helped me designing the book and those who have read me and given me their feedback regarding that. This will surely help me in writing more and writing good.

The book is available both in print version and as eBook. Here are the links, where you can buy it from:
Print Book on Pothi: http://goo.gl/g4SDBJ
eBook on Pothi (PDF): http://goo.gl/K5sbTM
eBook on Kindle: http://goo.gl/h9Iq3s
eBook on Google Books: http://goo.gl/YSwLdu
eBook on Google Play: http://goo.gl/DKxwwg


Saturday, February 7, 2015

Happy New Year

Yes, this year on the New Year, we were on a happy trip to Delhi and it was nice. We went to Dehradun, Missouri, Agra and a few places in and around Delhi and met a few people there too. It was a nice trip that let us get into the new year with happiness in the eyes. Though late, but let me wish you a very Happy New Year, people. Hope you have a wonderful, prosperous and blissful year of 2015!

There are many things to be done this year. I feel, this is THE YEAR and I am sure this is going to change a few things in life too. Already, with just a month gone, I am seeing things both at the professional and the personal front which are telling me that this year is going to be special. Let me not spill the beans right away. Time should bring in the news one by one.

Just ending the post (I know it is small) with this thought, which is making me feel sad intermittently these days. We are surrounded with people and few of them are our friends. When we are distressed we seek empathy from them and vice versa. But at times a few of them forget what we did for them and just keep reminding what they did for us. I think there should not be a balance sheet in friendship with all the credits and debits of help, empathies, sympathies and comforts that the friends share; but I may be wrong.

There are also instances where we can see our friends in very bad conditions – troubled, helpless and disturbed – and yet we can do nothing to help or comfort him/her. How can you see someone whom you love so much, someone whom you consider your close friend, someone whom you care for, die a slow death? But at times, as I said, you will also have to live with it.

This world has become so complex. It is hard to maintain a friendship and extend selfless assistance. The amount of jealousy, wariness, distrust and pessimism in other relationships which are equally dear to you will prevent you from doing what you want to or are able to do for a friend; or for anyone else, for that matter! I am not sure if I could express what I want to say now. I have not been writing these days, and it is somehow becoming tough for me to put my thoughts in words, I can feel it.

Anyways, with the Valentine’s Day around the corner, I wish you all a very good time ahead. Try to respect your relationships and provide same level of comfort, space and ease that you would want to enjoy. Do not make things complex – neither for yourself nor for others. And I wish those who are searching, that you find THE ONE for yourself who LOVES you in all varied meaning of that word. 
Have fun!

PS: I normally do not preach through this blog, but then I think this post has gone wayward.


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